By Melissa Dougherty
We all want to be wise in our spiritual walk. We want to progress and make good decisions that will pay off in the long run. We long to live wisely in all areas of our lives and be an example to others. But what I have seen is that the path to get there is not always the easiest. In my experience, I have witnessed what we would consider mature Christians who truly live according to these characteristics. But I have also seen others who lack them. Today I want to share with you five signs of what I consider to be proof of spiritual maturity. These characteristics have a biblical basis and are observable by the way some Christians behave in certain situations.
1.) They react according to the Scriptures and based on the character of God and not according to their feelings and emotions.
The most spiritually mature people I know are also the most emotionally mature. They make their decisions in accordance with the wisdom of Scripture and logic, and the fruit of the Spirit is visible in their lives, especially the part about self-control. They take time to think and evaluate situations and treat others the way they want to be treated. They do not project their faults on others and are conscious of this in their interactions and when expressing their judgments and opinions. They think before they act. They usually have a witty and intentional sense of humor but without humiliating or offending others. They are an example of what is written in James 1:19, where it says to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. They obtain their values from the Scriptures and also follow them. All of this is placed above their emotions and with this they avoid making hasty decisions or having emotional outbursts. Did you know that there is an IQ to measure general intelligence? Well, there is also an IQ for “emotional intelligence,” and I have found that spiritually mature people also have a high IQ for emotional intelligence. Costi Hinn once said, “A mark of maturity and self-control is having enough control over your emotions to be able to understand those who disagree with you.”
2.) They listen more and talk less.
In the previous point I referenced James 1:19. People who live by this passage tend to be more interested in the person they are talking to and avoid unnecessary arguments. And they don’t get offended by everything. I read a post on social media that said, “An immature Christian is hard to please and easy to offend.” Luke 6:45 says that people show good or bad things depending on what is in their heart. Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. Restraining your mouth is directly related to what is in your heart, and it is especially seen in what is said on social media. If you only have a hammer, everything will look like a nail. But spiritually mature Christians are different. They are people who seek first to understand and then to be understood. They try to respond to their listeners from a place of love grounded in love for God. They weigh the other person’s perspective even when it is contrary to their own. But they are not condescending when theological errors appear. They can sort out and decide which topics to avoid and which to delve into, and they are able to engage in deep conversations without arguing every time. Proverbs 15:1 says that a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. They look to others for spiritual advice and answers, and they welcome their shortcomings to be pointed out to them.
3.) They have a marked sense of humility.
They don’t seek to be above others. After observing them I realized that they live to serve, and they live like that in ministry too. They are like strangers or go unnoticed (even though everyone knows who they are!) They have a healthy self-confidence, and it is normal for them to be interested in others. They don’t always do it with the intention of teaching them something, but they instinctively know how to ask questions, they are easy to get to know others, and they treat everyone with respect because everyone is made in the image of God, especially when they don’t agree with them. They don’t tend to rebuke those who have a different opinion than them, nor do they demonize things they don’t approve of. They show love as described in 1 Corinthians 13. They are kind, patient, not boastful, they rejoice in the truth, and they seek God’s glory, not their own. In my experience, these Christians don’t brag about “having discernment” or “being humble.” They just show it off. They don’t need people’s praise for what they do. They do what they do to please God and God alone. But without being indifferent to others. This is easily visible by the way they treat, converse with, and love others. When they make mistakes, they have enough awareness and humility to recognize that it is necessary to make amends and admit their mistake. They don’t get defensive and if necessary, they take steps to change.
4.) They are self-aware.
A spiritually mature person can read an audience and is aware of how others perceive them. They show restraint in their social behavior. They are people who are able to control themselves during conversations and know when and in what situations they should step back to reconsider their feelings. They are aware that they represent Jesus and that their actions and words have consequences. And more than that, they are sharp-witted enough to understand how their words and actions will affect others. James 3 tells us a lot about controlling our tongue. He compares the tongue to the rudder that steers a great ship. In verse 5 it says, “So the tongue is a small member, and yet it boasts of great things. Behold, how a great forest is set on fire by a small fire!” James 1:26 says, “If anyone thinks he is religious but does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man’s religion is worthless.”
5.) They set healthy boundaries and have authentic discernment.
Not every occurrence or feeling is attributed to a sign from God or interpreted as the movement of the Holy Spirit, nor do they consider that everything they think, feel or hear is the Holy Spirit speaking to them. They do not boast about their ability to discern. They just do it. They learn to develop discernment without resorting to paranoia. They are not conceited about the vast spiritual experiences they have lived, or how intense they were, or even about their great intelligence. They are like any person who comes to listen to a conversation believing that they can learn something from the other person, even though they know more than the one who is speaking! They do not listen to them in order to ridicule them later. They also know when to say no and when to say yes. A spiritually mature person knows that the word “no” is a healthy response. They know how to honor God with their time and they know their personal limits. They have enough common sense to know when to enter into a conversation, event or activity and when to leave. And they are equally aware of where God wants them to be. They prefer to trust in what God will do as they persevere in prayer and reading the Scriptures rather than being carried away by their moods that change every day.
In short, they are the living example of what Galatians 5:22-23 says: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” And they also live out what we find in Hebrews 3 regarding living a life of obedience.
So by their fruits, you will recognize them.
Recommended resources in Spanish:
Stealing from God ( Paperback ), ( Teacher Study Guide ), and ( Student Study Guide ) by Dr. Frank Turek
Why I Don’t Have Enough Faith to Be an Atheist ( Complete DVD Series ), ( Teacher’s Workbook ), and ( Student’s Handbook ) by Dr. Frank Turek
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Melissa Dougherty is a Christian apologist best known for her YouTube channel where she features content from a former New-Ager . She holds two associate’s degrees, one in Early Childhood Multicultural Education and another in Liberal Arts . She is currently pursuing a Bachelor of Arts degree in Religious Studies from Southern Evangelical Seminary .
Translated by:
Translator Gustavo Camarillo
Edited by Monica Pirateque
Original Blog Source: https://bit.ly/41fvOEj