The Bible: Embarrassing and True (Part 2)


Do the New Testament documents tell the truth about what really happened in the first century?  As I wrote in my last column, authors claiming to write history are unlikely to invent embarrassing details about themselves or their heroes.  Since the New Testament documents are filled with embarrassing details, we can be reasonably certain that they are telling the truth.

 

Notice that the disciples frequently depict themselves as dim wits.  They fail to understand what Jesus is saying several times, and don’t understand what his mission is about until after the resurrection.  Their thick-headedness even earns their leader, Peter, the sternest rebuke from Jesus:  “Get behind me Satan!” (What great press the disciples provided for their leader and first Pope! Contrary to popular opinion, it seems the church really didn’t have editorial control of the scriptures after all.)

 

After Jesus asks them to stay up and pray with him during his greatest hour of need, the disciples fall asleep on Jesus not once, but twice!  Then, after pledging to be faithful to the end, Peter denies Christ three times, and all but one of them run away.

 

The scared, scattered, skeptical disciples make no effort to give Jesus a proper burial.  Instead they say a member of the Jewish ruling body that sentenced Jesus to die is the noble one—Joseph of Arimathea buries Jesus in a Jewish tomb (which would have been easy for the Jews to refute if it wasn’t true).  Two days later, while the men are still hiding, the women go down and discover the empty tomb and the risen Jesus.  

 

Who wrote all that down?  Men—some of the men who were characters in the story.  Now if you were part of a group of men trying to pass off a false resurrection story as the truth, would you depict yourselves as dim-witted, bumbling, rebuked, lazy, skeptical sissies, who ran away at the first sign of trouble, while the women were the brave ones who discovered the empty tomb and the risen Jesus?  

 

If men were inventing the resurrection story, it would go more like this:

 

Jesus came to save the world, and he needed our help.  That’s why we were there for him every step of the way.  When he was in need, we prayed with him.  When he wept, we wept with him (and told him to toughen up!).  When he fell, we carried his cross.  The gates of Hell could not prevent us from seeing his mission through!

 

So when that turncoat Judas brought the Romans by (we always suspected Judas), and they began to nail Jesus to the cross, we laughed at them.  “He’s God you idiots!  The grave will never keep him! You think you’re solving a problem, but you’re really creating a much bigger one!”

 

While we assured the women that everything would turn out all right, they couldn’t handle the crucifixion.  Squeamish and afraid, they ran to their homes screaming and hid behind locked doors.   

 

But we men stood steadfast at the foot of the cross, praying for hours until the very end. When Jesus finally took his last breath and the Roman Centurion confessed that Jesus was God, Peter blasted him, “That’s what we told you before you nailed him up there!” (Through this whole thing, the Romans and the Jews just wouldn’t listen!) 

 

Never doubting that Jesus would rise on the third day, Peter announced to the Centurion, “We’ll bury him and be back on Sunday. Now go tell Pilate to put some of your ‘elite’ Roman guards at the tomb to see if you can prevent him from rising from the dead!”  We all laughed and began to dream about Sunday.

 

That Sunday morning we marched right down to the tomb and tossed those elite Roman guards aside.  Then the stone (that took eleven us to roll into place) rolled away by itself.  A glowing Jesus emerged from tomb, and said, “I knew you’d come! My mission is accomplished.” He praised Peter for his brave leadership and congratulated us on our great faith.  Then we went home and comforted the trembling women.

 

There are other events in the New Testament documents concerning Jesus that are also unlikely to be made up.  For example, Jesus:

 

·       Is considered “out of his mind” by his own family who come to seize him to take him home (Mk 3:21,31).

·       Is deserted by many of his followers after he says that followers must eat his flesh and drink his blood. (John 6:66).

·       Is not believed by his own brothers (John 7:5).  (Disbelief turned to belief after the resurrection—ancient historians tell us that Jesus’ brother James died a martyr as the leader of the church in Jerusalem in A.D. 62).

·       Is thought to be a deceiver (John 7:12).

·       Turns off Jewish believers to the point that they want to stone him (John 8:30-59).

·       Is called a “madman” (John 10:20).

·       Is called a “drunkard” (Mt. 11:19).

·       Is called “demon-possessed” (Mk 3:22, Jn 7:20, 8:48).

·       Has his feet wiped with hair of a prostitute which easily could have been seen as a sexual advance (Lk 7:36-39).

·       Is crucified despite the fact that “anyone who is hung on a tree is under God’s curse” (Deut 21:23).

 

If you’re inventing a Messiah to the Jews, you don’t say such things about him.  You also don’t admit that some of you “still doubted” Jesus had really risen from the dead, especially while he’s standing right in front of you giving the great commission (Mt. 28:17-19). 

 

Finally, anyone trying to pass off a false resurrection story as the truth would never say the women were the first witnesses at the tomb.  In the first century, a woman’s testimony was not considered on par with that of a man.  An invented story would say that the men—the brave men—had discovered the empty tomb.  Yet all four gospels say the women were the first witnesses – all this while the sissy-pants men had their doors locked for fear of the Jews.  (After I made this point during a presentation, a lady told me that she knew why Jesus appeared to the women first.  “Why?” I asked.  She said, “Because he wanted to get the story out!”)

 

In light of these embarrassing details—along with the fact that the New Testament documents contain early, eyewitness testimony for which the writers gave their lives—it takes more faith to believe that the New Testament writers were not telling the truth.   

(This column was originally published at www.Townhall.com)